My new job
Not as in the new job I have. But the new job I want -- even if it really doesn't exist. To wit:
LONGMONT, Colo. - A man claiming to be a police detective tried to get an adult novelty shop to give him free X-rated videos, saying he wanted to make sure the performers weren't underage, authorities said.
He made three tries within nine days last month and was turned down each time. The store manager called police after the third try.
Authorities said Monday that the man showed a badge and left a business card from the Longmont police "age verification unit." Cmdr. Tim Lewis said there is no such unit.
All of which leaves me with one question for Cmdr. Tim Lewis: Dude, why isn't there such a unit? You should be ashamed of yourself.